Today's Heartlift with Janell
Sometimes the story we tell ourselves is not really true. Sometimes the story others tell about us is not really true. On "Today's Heartlift with Janell," Author, Trauma-informed, board-certified marriage and family specialist, and Professional Heartlifter, Janell Rardon, opens conversations about how emotional health and mental fitness effects absolutely every area of our lives. When we possess and practice healthy, strong, resilient emotional health practices, life is so much better. Read Janell's newest book, "Stronger Every Day: 9 Tools for an Emotionally Healthy You."
Today's Heartlift with Janell
325. Faith Speaks: How God's Word Transforms Motherhood
Emily Assel shares how the Word of God transforms motherhood and the power of making declarations over our lives and families.
• Understanding how connecting with God changes the way we parent.
• Learning to use small moments with God rather than feeling guilty about lacking hours for study.
• Discovering the difference between "manifestation" and biblical declarations.
• Why do our words, paired with faith, release power, especially when aligned with God's purpose?
• Finding your identity as God's beloved daughter, regardless of your performance.
• Breaking through the fear of hoping when you've been disappointed.
• The feeling of being "too big for your own life" and what it means.
• How restlessness can be God's invitation to something more.
Check out Emily's new book "Wherever You Are" and connect with her on Instagram for more inspiration in your motherhood journey.
Read more about Emily and her passions: Generation Claimed
Order your very own copy of Emily's newest book(s): When It Hurts and Wherever You Are
Read more about Emily's publishing journey: My Writing Journey
Begin Your Heartlifter's Journey:
- Visit and subscribe to Heartlift Central on Substack. This is our new online coaching center and meeting place for Heartlifters worldwide.
- Download the "Overcoming Hurtful Words" Study Guide PDF: BECOMING EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY
- Meet me on Instagram: @janellrardon
- Leave a review and rate the podcast: WRITE A REVIEW
- Learn more about my books and work: Janell Rardon
- Make a tax-deductible donation through Heartlift International
As I've listened to the stories of thousands of women of all ages in all kinds of stages through the years, I've kept their stories locked in the vault of my heart. I feel as if they've been walking around with me all through these years. They've bothered me, they've prodded me and sometimes kept me up at night. Ultimately, they've increased my passion to reframe and reimagine the powerful positions of mother and matriarch within the family system. I'm a problem solver, so I set out to find a way to perhaps change the trajectory of this silent and sad scenario about a dynamic yet untapped source of potential and purpose sitting in our homes and churches. It is time to come to the table, heartlifters, and unleash the power of maternal presence into the world. Welcome to Mothering for the Ages, our 2025 theme, here on today's Heartlift. I'm Janelle. I am your guide here on this heartlifting journey. I invite you to grab a pen, a journal and a cup of something really delicious. May today's conversation give you clarity, courage and a revived sense of camaraderie. You see, you're not on this journey alone. We are unified as heartlifters and committed to bringing change into the world one heart at a time.
Speaker 1:Hello and welcome to part two of my conversation with Emily Ossol. I am so excited about where this conversation goes. You know you can have all the notes you want, but then, as Emily attributes, the Holy Spirit takes over. I'm not sure where you are in your faith journey, but Emily is very passionate, and so am I, about our relationship with the Trinity the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Some call it the Holy Ghost and it's just delightful where the Holy Spirit leads our conversation, reminding us that we you and me are God's daughter. Our faith is released through our words and our deeds. Faith is released through our words and our deeds. And Amos 3.3 comes into the conversation. Can two walk together unless they be agreed? Agreement is very important to God, our words agreeing with what he has in his mind for our lives.
Speaker 1:And at the end of my conversation, wow, emily says I felt too big for my own life. Boy, do I get it? But she went through a valley during that time where she stifled her beliefs. She said I can't hope anymore. I can't reach too big. I had a call, but my beliefs are too small. And finally, am I afraid to reach for more? That hits home for me. It really does. And so she brings to mind this question that I want us to be talking about. You know where to meet me over at Heart Lift Central on Substack, instagram and Facebook. Today's Heart Lift with Janelle. The question is are you ready? Are you satisfied with your life? Are you satisfied with your life? Are you perhaps stifling your beliefs? Are you afraid to reach for more? Wow, okay, let's begin this conversation and I can't wait to talk to you about it some more.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so this book actually really started again long before, uh, anything else. I was sitting in the back porch with two of my mom friends and I was talking about how important the word of god is and I'm saying, you know, it changes the way you, mother, and it changed all of these things. And my friend looked at me and she said, emily, I can barely take a shower by myself, much less get into the word of God. Like, how do I do that? And you know, I was reminded.
Speaker 2:The Holy Spirit reminded me of the story of Jesus and his disciples at the temple. And we see these guys come and they're dropping off these huge sums of money, right, and they're putting all these sacrifices of so much money and his disciples are so impressed. And then this little widow woman comes and she puts in two mites, right. And I felt like that's how, as moms sometimes we are, we see people spending so much time in the Word and in the seat that I'm in now, I can spend so much time. But then Jesus looked at the widow woman and said she gave two mites, but she gave the most because she gave all that she had and maybe even what she didn't.
Speaker 2:And as moms. Sometimes that's how it is for us we have too much, but when we give to Jesus all that we have, he is so overwhelmed by our gift, he is so overwhelmed by our offering. So I started writing these devotions, actually just for two friends of mine. It sat on my desk until um, and now again, day two of our Daniel's fast many, many years later this was a couple of years ago um reached out and said hey, we were wondering if you wanted to write a devotional for moms.
Speaker 1:That's not how it works, and I'm like okay, okay, lord.
Speaker 2:And so I actually sat down and met with the girl and I said we set up a meeting for, like you know, a week later, and I said I've got something to show you. And she was like okay. And so I pulled up these devotions that I already had written, and she's like this wasn't. I didn't know you had anything written. This wasn't supposed to be you pitching me. And I said I, I it was already there, like the Lord. The Lord is coming after his daughter.
Speaker 1:So that's me, it's not. It's not me.
Speaker 2:He's saying I want to reach my daughters wherever they are. I want them in their two minutes. I don't want them to feel that they can't meet with me, whether it's two minutes or two hours or however much. So I always say I'm just so, I'm just so blessed that I'm like thank you, god for picking me, that I get to come along and work with you on this and be a part of it.
Speaker 2:So again, that's kind of the again the story. That doesn't happen. But that's that's how God works and has brought this book apart. Brought this book along, excuse me.
Speaker 1:No, what I love is you were already doing it. You were being faithful to two friends. You know, I think I've lost that in the sense when you are traditionally published, when you are a public, you know you've had books and books, and so then you're like writing to two friends. Why would you do that? Do you see the flip of that? Yeah, flipping. You know, don't lose the power of a handwritten note, or if you have the gift of teaching, like I suspect you do, like sharing it, share it. Just, you had a conversation on the back porch. Listen to this, heart lifters, please, because I know that one of the things that so many of us feel, especially in the aging process, is I'm invisible, I have nothing. You know what's my life all about now? Uh, I have no purpose, baloney.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that's baloney.
Speaker 1:Baloney, I don't know what to say. You know, you're just so much crystallized wisdom is sitting. So who? Who can you write a lovely note to or send a little small teaching to? So that's how this evolved. You just said something that boy, I can't pass it. How I'm? This is the question I got from. How does Emily the word change? Mothering, holy moly. Please teach to that at mom. Please teach that everywhere you know. Keep a peaceful life while you're doing it, but how? Does how does the word change mothering I?
Speaker 2:haven't heard it said like hmm, yeah, I think the first thing is that I never realized I have learned the most about being God's daughter from being a mother to my children.
Speaker 2:Right, that's, the first thing is realizing that the love that I have for my children is from God, and so being able to realize that. And then what I've seen in my own life is that when I allow God to extend grace to me, I allow God to extend forgiveness to me. When I see and believe and let the word transform my relationship with God, that overflows in how I relate to my children. When I know that God is not angry with me a week later, but he sits with me and says Emily, what's the root of why you got angry? What's going on? Let me meet you, let me minister to you, Let me love on you. Then, when my daughter starts yelling at my son about something it's so much easier and so much more natural to be Natalie, what's really going on here? Where's the hurt? Where is the pain? And I think there's so much right in the Bible that transforms.
Speaker 2:But the first thing is where we are transformed. Then transforms how we relate to other people, especially our children.
Speaker 1:It does. So what I'm hearing you say, though behind that is you must have some form, whether it's one minute, two minutes. I was a mom of littles. I had twins and a four-year-old. Like hello, life was crazy, totally crazy. Don't know how I did it, but I did believe the word.
Speaker 1:You know I did, and that's how I shaped my identity, you know, as a new Christian at age 21. You know, it was like I know that's how I shaped my identity. You know, as a new Christian at age 21. You know, it was like I don't know who I am. So let me just put up post-it notes about who God says I am. So what you're saying is you have to have some. Ok, I'm going to say it this way. I said it before already. You just walk and talk with God all day. Is that safe?
Speaker 2:Yes, yes that is very safe to say as much as I can. I'm not perfect. There are moments when I do not and I forget.
Speaker 1:We are not perfect, no that's one of our, our tenants here.
Speaker 1:We do not know. We are reformed perfectionist, you know. But I would say that what I see is you just are trying to commune with God as you go through the day. It may not look like an hour of journaling or an hour of this so-said quiet time or whatever. You are really embodying the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost as you go through the day and therefore it's framing your reactions and responses to your children and husband inside the home. So we've been talking a lot about the emotional atmosphere inside the home and how that needs to be the safe haven for children.
Speaker 1:So you do this by having this living, active relationship. He's not some big God on a king, on a throne that you don't have access to.
Speaker 2:No, no, you're right. I mean, that's the wonderful thing is, he is our father. And I will tell you sometimes that's easier, sometimes that's harder when I have had seasons where I know I have struggled. I know for a while I was struggling with anger. I knew for a while I was struggling with, goodness gracious, competition or whatever it is. I think that there is a lot of power in saying you know what I wrote out, not sticky notes, but note cards, very similar, and I stuck those around my house. I stuck them over the kitchen sink, because that's where we get irritated as moms, right?
Speaker 1:I'm the one doing the dishes. I'm cooking the dinner. I'm the one watching TV, right.
Speaker 2:And so when I felt those feelings, those emotions coming, I was very specific to say, okay, stop, my feelings are good and God gave me my feelings. But what is the truth? Right, when I said I'm angry, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I said, no, you know what, my struggle is not against flesh and blood, it's against powers and get the principalities. You know what? When I'm angry about my husband cause he forgot to take out the trash the 15th time, or whatever it is.
Speaker 2:No, but I forgive the way I have been forgiven, and I was forgiven before the foundations of the world, before I said sorry, before I even knew I was wrong. And so, when I specifically said Lord, this is something I'm struggling in, but I am choosing to believe your truth over what I say I am, I am choosing to transform my mind with your word. Again, we can talk neuroplasticity and all of the things, but the truth is is that every time a thought comes to your mind, it does not get put away the same. It either goes back stronger or it goes back weaker. And so every time I had to make that choice to say no, I forgive, no, I believe that God is doing something new in me. No, I believe that I am not a failure, that when I plant seeds, I will see the fruit of that in due season and being able to actually transform my mind with the help of the Holy Spirit, with the strength of the word, I am not the same person that I was. I mean, thank God, right.
Speaker 1:20 years ago.
Speaker 2:Amen, it's not me, it is the word of God. When we specifically say God, I submit to your word, I choose that your truth. Right Again, the word of God says that his ways are far above my ways. And I say, god, your word says this. Even though I feel this, I am going to choose, and, holy Spirit, please help me, because I'm not always great. This. It has transformed me into a new person.
Speaker 2:And then to be able to, throughout the day, commune with the Holy Spirit, talk with God, god, this is really hard. Can you help me here? Can you give me wisdom when I don't know the answer? Or again, stopping and saying you know what I need to go, take a time out myself and look at what the word of God says about this. Um, it's, it is. I don't know. I get passionate because I I'm desperate, right, you know. I hear people say that I don't. I am not. I do not have a genius level IQ. I have not been to seminary. I know the word of God because I was desperate for it, because I needed it and I saw it become alive to me.
Speaker 2:And you know it's like Peter said, like where would we go? Where else do I have to go?
Speaker 1:Oh, I love that yes.
Speaker 2:Where else could I go but the?
Speaker 1:word yes, yes, yes, it's active, like you said, and I love that. A few minutes ago, you also said the Lord is chasing his daughters. Yes, what does that mean? What is that? Why, wherever you are, is so important at this time? Because you are going to be giving women, you're activating women to embody the spirit and live in that. Therefore, then they can speak it. You know he's chasing his daughters. What? Why is he chasing?
Speaker 2:his daughters? Well, goodness gracious, I think there's a lot of answers to that question, but I think the number one, most important answer comes back to the fact that you are his daughter and he loves you and he wants to be near you, right, like when my teenager comes and plops next to him on my couch. I don't think here's your sixth chore that you didn't get done today, or here's the rude thing. You said I want to sit and talk with him because I love him, because I delight in him, because I want to hear what he has to say, and I think that somewhere along the way, ooh, we have lost the fact that God loves you and he delights in you and he wants to connect with you and he misses you when you're not around.
Speaker 2:And that doesn't mean that you should feel guilty because you were like. His heart for you is love and he wants you and he loves you, and I think you know I'm sure you've talked about it in your podcast as well and he loves you and I think you know I'm sure you've talked about it in your podcast as well but even that, the authority and the responsibility and the influence that we have as mothers, you know, I, when I first started writing this book, I remember thinking like Lord, I'm going to be holding up, you know, the sword of the spirit, the word of God, and I'm going to be, you know, like.
Speaker 1:I get a little passionate, I get a little excited. I'm cutting down the enemy.
Speaker 2:I'm going after moms and I felt like the Holy Spirit said no, Emily, that's actually not what you're doing. You're handing out swords, you are arming a generation of moms. And I was like, like you said, oh okay, lord, okay, I'll arm your army of women.
Speaker 1:You're handing out swords. Stop, stop, don't move on. Okay, we're handing out swords here today. I love that. Swords of the spirit. I shall say Amen, and as you take in wherever you are these devotions and declarations from Emily, you can raise your sword and that's where you can claim your generation.
Speaker 2:Amen.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, it's so, so powerful. I have one more question before I want you to read to us a beautiful devotion, because you and I talked about, before we got going, the difference.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Yes, but for of speaking the word over your children, your life, your marriage, your lineage. And there's this huge movement today it's not new of manifestation, right and boy it can. It can lure me for sure. I've been there and even in past times there were people within the body of Christ that you know, name it, claim it kind of thing. So what's the difference?
Speaker 2:What's the difference? I think there's two. I think there's two main differences. Number one is realizing what we're given power and authority for Right. So, for example, I always explain it this way when I leave my house, I put my 15 year old son in charge for dinner, I warm up the pizza rolls, whatever. So there is a level of power and authority, but he has to operate within the power and authority for the assignment that I've given him right.
Speaker 2:He does not have the power and authority to turn to his sisters and say you guys need to go clean my room for me? No, that's not what the power and authority is for. Number one, they probably won't listen to him, right, like or like. It's not going to work If we're starting to claim things that are not along with the assignment and authority of God has given us. It won't work. Or B, if it does work, when I get home he's going to be in trouble, right? And there is a verse I don't remember off the top of my head, but Jesus talks about when I come back and if I have found that you have abused my servants and my slaves.
Speaker 2:Woe to you, you will end up, you know, burning and all of these things. So I think the first thing is we have to realize my son doesn't have any authority on his own. We don't have any authority on our own. We are gifted God's authority for a reason, for an assignment within a sphere, and it's not to make my life better, it is to extend the kingdom of God.
Speaker 1:Oh, yes, so that's number one.
Speaker 2:That's it. That's huge. Yes, that's number one is. And then number two is it's not just words. We see in Romans 10, that our words and our faith are linked.
Speaker 1:Right, I'm going to pull out the Bible. Pull out the Bible, girl. Go ahead, give us a word.
Speaker 2:Okay, let's see here I'm pulling. It's kind of great. I don't even need the Bible in front of me, but I'm going to do it anyways.
Speaker 2:Okay, so it talks about how can they call on him to save unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about them? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells about him? So this is we've probably heard lots of different versions, but talking about how do we believe when we hear, and hearing and believing are linked together. We see it so many times, even within Romans 10,. It talks about if you believe in your heart and if you declare with your mouth, then you will be saved.
Speaker 2:It's both Jesus said if you have faith to move a mountain and you say to that mountain the faith and belief are intertwined. When I say them with my mouth, again neuroplasticity, something within my brain is changed. We see in James. It talks about how our tongue is like the rudder of a ship or the bit of a mouth, that our tongue is the power of life and death.
Speaker 2:I won't go through all the verses here forever talking about the power of God, but the Lord has given us authority and when we use our tongues and join it with faith into what God says, we know what the Bible says about faith. Nothing is impossible and our faith releases is released through our words, and our and our words release faith.
Speaker 1:It's a cycle you know, like it talks about well, it's alignment, isn't it yeah?
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, yes, that's a better way of saying it. For sure it's alignment. For sure it's yes.
Speaker 1:Can two walk together unless they are agreed. So it goes back. How can I walk or talk or move unless I have? The way that I always like to explain this is Jesus. When he maybe you know we always say he went away to get a break, for rest, whatever, but I believe he went away when maybe he was he felt every emotion we feel he was feeling the overwhelming needs he was, whatever needs he was, whatever he would go away to align himself because he needed to know his father's business for him.
Speaker 1:So he went away because perhaps, like us, he started to get overwhelmed. Or, oh, who do I help? Or I don't know, I'm not Jesus, you know, but I feel like he went away, sure to rest his weariness and receive power back, but to align and go okay, now what's my business? Because there's a lot of business out there. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And that's what you're saying, or you?
Speaker 1:know what, like you do, like what are you saying to me now? What is my next assignment? I just think that's so powerful because you went and studied the word about our words. I've done the same, you know, and I think, when you write down everything in the scripture about what he says about our word, our words, our deeds, all of it is about alignment. So I appreciate the difference and the is that, yeah, you have another, no, you're good, because the end, all is like what you said it is not about advancing our own kingdom, yeah, amen, it is about advancing the kingdom of God and end of discussion.
Speaker 2:Amen, amen, it's so true, it's so true.
Speaker 1:So one more little quick thing you write, uh in in the beginning of something I read today, that you felt too big for your own life, emily. I don't know what that means. What does?
Speaker 2:that mean it meant uh, those words came um again before all of the books all of the other things and I um, because of the hard times that we had been through, I had to begin to stifle my hope, stifle what I believed, stifle what I believe. I was called for and I said I'm just going to clean my stove and I'm just going to make sure that I have everything lined up. I'm not going to hope for anything anymore, I'm not going to reach for anything anymore, because I had fallen and gotten hurt so many times that I said I'm just going to stay here and as we, you know, it's easy to say this now, however, many years later. But God had a call on my life and I don't know everybody's call is different, but for me there was a call on my life and I felt that call. I felt that there was restlessness in me, but I didn't want to reach for more. I was afraid to reach for more because we had fallen so many times that I write in the book my hope was too small, my finances were too small.
Speaker 2:My house we were in the trailer at the time was too small. My beliefs were too small. I felt like everything, everything I said. I felt like Alice in Wonderland or you know more Star Wars, right where the walls are closing in on you. I don't know if I'm getting too big for my own life or everything is shrinking around me. Yeah, um, thank you for so. I went to the Lord and I said Lord, I'm not satisfied here, I want something more. And God said good, because I want something more for you too. And so began my journey into saying okay, lord, what is that? What does that look like? What can I hope for? Again, how, how can you expand, um, expand my borders, expand my horizons, expand my hope, um and again.
Speaker 1:It's easy to say that now 15 years later, knowing what the outcome of that was.
Speaker 2:But back then, um, it was scary to hope, it was scary to hope, it was scary to dream, it was scary to reach for something more, oh, wow.
Speaker 1:I am so thankful that we had that little bit of conversation there, because that's life changing.
Speaker 2:I get it.
Speaker 1:I get it from the deepest part, and the fact that the restlessness to me is often the sign, the signal, the Holy Spirit inside going this isn't it. Yeah, we're not done. We're not done. This is too big for your life or too small for your life. It can go both ways. So if the fact that you prayed to God, I'm not satisfied with my life is free, what a bold prayer. Okay, you know, heartlifters, this is our lean in moment. Maybe you're not satisfied with your life, so lean into it and go talk to your father in heaven. Amen, I can't wait to hear what happens. Emily, would you read us out, with a beautiful devotion, from your brand new, stunning, wherever you are, wherever you are. What a beautiful, beautiful word amen.
Speaker 2:Okay, so this is uh devotion 26 and it says you are dearly loved. Matthew 3 17 said a voice from heaven said this is my dearly loved son, who brings me great joy. That says if you have more time, you can read more. And there's verses in here Twice. God spoke these words audibly about his son Jesus. He didn't say because he didn't say when, he didn't list Jesus' deeds or characteristics. He said he is my son Jesus. He is loved. He brings me so much joy. God says his name about us countless times throughout his word.
Speaker 2:Pause and take a deep breath, shut out whatever is going on within and around you and hear God's gentle whisper you are my dearly loved daughter. You bring me so much joy. And then every section ends with a declaration to declare over yourself. Declare out loud over yourself I am God's dearly loved daughter. I bring him joy simply because I am his. And then we take that same declaration and we declare it out loud over our children or our family. You put in child's name is God's dearly loved child. That child brings him joy simply because they are his. A child brings him joy simply because they are his. Then we have a moment at the end that's connect with your heavenly father. What is one or more things that he's done that you're thankful for? What is something you appreciate about who dad is? And then I encourage you to set a timer for one minute and, wherever you are, pause and rest in his presence. Yes and amen, amen.
Speaker 1:Emily, thank you. Continue being an illuminator who brings us wisdom, joy, exuberance, delight. You bring all of those things to us and I am so grateful that you came here and sat at the table with us today, thank you.
Speaker 2:Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1:Thanks for being with us today, heartlifter. Be sure to check the show notes for all of the many places you can find Emily on Instagram, on her website and where you can find her books. It's just been such a delight to have Emily with us. I'd love to keep this conversation going. You know that I'd love to keep this conversation going. You know that. So meet me on Heart Lift Central over at Substack or Today's Heart Lift with Janelle on Facebook and my Instagram at Janelle Rairdon.
Speaker 1:If you would just take a moment this is so important and leave a review for the podcast and perhaps give it a good rating, I would be so appreciative. You can find how and where and when to do that on JanelleRiordancom slash podcast. Just go all the way down to the bottom of that page and you will see line by line directions on how to leave a review and a rating. That increases our reach and that just makes so many more people all over the world be able to be encouraged and given hope in their lives. Thank you so much for being with me today. Until next time.
